Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Building a fortress.
The neighbors directly behind us are putting up a fence. We dont really know them and I think I said hi to the lady once. I do know they have crazy fights (this one time her husband was yelling at her in the middle of the street while she tired to not hit her Jag on the cars outside of the garage) and that they have a disabled son with whom they constantly yell at when hes out back mowing their lawn. Our backyard goes up on a hill and then slopes down to their yard so its nice they are putting up this fence. It saves us the money to do so (we would never put in one anyways cause we just dont care) and we dont get to watch her sunbathe in her kiddie pool while we eat dinner at our kitchen table. It wouldnt be so bad if she was you know, a 21 yr old.
Suffocating.
We lived in Louisiana 7 years ago and it was hotter then hell there too. Ohio is kinda like that. Full of rednecks, bad food and HOT ass weather. 97* at 7pm is not my ideal. The west coast looks better and better every day.
One day...
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Calvin and Hobbes.
Growing up Mike and I both loved "Calvin and Hobbes" books. When I mean loved, I mean LOVED them. They were a big part of our childhoods and I can remember reading my 1st on in the 5th grade and laughing like a jackass. Till this day I still laugh and I credit a lot of my wit to Bill Watterson . For our 10yr anniversary mike bought me the collectors edition of the books that are now displayed on our dresser like a piece of art. While I respect Watterson's decision to not mass market his art that left people like us always pining for a Hobbes stuffed animal or toy; we too wanted to be like 6yr old Calvin and his stuffed tiger. We named Calvin after, you guessed it, the comic and we all know that Calvin needs his Hobbes. So Mike went to Etsy.com and had one made.
Calvin and Hobbes
And yes I know we are THOSE parents. Good luck Cal, you cant pick whom youre born to. Sorry kiddo.
Calvin and Hobbes
And yes I know we are THOSE parents. Good luck Cal, you cant pick whom youre born to. Sorry kiddo.
Friday, July 30, 2010
10 years!
Mike and I made it to our 10 year wedding anniversary on Wednesday the 28th. A pretty good accomplishment for two people who arent even 30 yet. Of course we have been through pretty much every crappie thing a married couple can be through but I chalk that up to a lot of stupid stuff young people do. Mike and I love each other very much but always say that no one should get married till they are 25 years old and above. This way you get all your selfish party "Im an adult and I can do what I want and who cares that youre in a relationship with me" ways. By that age you should be somewhat accomplished in your life and figure out who you are and what you want from your life. Mike and I are there too, but we kinda grew up with each other and then got there. Now we are on the same page with everything pretty much. We both want one kid, want to one day move home but know that may not happen and maybe want to move some where coastal (we really like the water) in a few years, want our son to have a good life, want to be relaxed and drama free and rely on each other as we have been doing for so long.
It wasnt always this way though. We toyed awhile with even having a child. Especially since we live far from family and knew that it may be kinda selfish to have a child and not have their family around for them to know. Also, we have no help with family being away so that was a big thing. Being financially secure was a plus as Mike was still in the military and we lived in a small base house when we really considered what life would be like with a child. So we wanted to be sure we could afford a kid even though no one can ever afford a kid. Or themselves most of the time. Mike and I also wanted to be secure with each other. We didnt want to bring a child into this world and then rip his heart out with a divorce. With all the crap you go through in any relationship, unlike the movies, its not always roses. Theres a lot of dust and bugs and piles of crap along the way that either make you break you. For us, it made us stronger I think.
Mike is my foundation, walls and roof. I honestly dont know how my life would be with out him. Not because hes the main bread winner but because he really is my other half. We both have so much in common now and like to do the same things (as well as do things separately) that everything seems to flow smoothly. Im pretty sure he feels the same way too. I trust him 100% and he bends over backwards to make sure Calvin has everything he needs and that I can stay home and not put Calvin in a cruddy daycare (not knocking it for those who have to but I dont want to have to do that). Mike is a strong man with whom I always feel safe with and I know will defend me to the death. Hes an amazing father who loves his son and took to him like neither of us expected. Mike supports me and gives me piece of mind and always reassures the fact that Im being a good wife and mother.
I find now that I worry more about his safety then if hes going to find another women. If he does find another women then she better know how to clean and if so then I dont mind handing him over to her once and awhile. I kid, I kid. She better know how to cook too.
Mikes in Vegas for the next 5 days for some computer hacker convention thats supposed to be the biggest one they have all year. Hence the big deal in Vegas. Last year he couldnt go because I just spent 9 months gestating our son and then another 24hrs to push the almost full grown kid out. This year our big 10yr anniversary was the day before the Vegas fun times was going to begin. He really didnt push to go and I didnt think much of it. We thought money wise we wouldnt be able to swing it too so it was out of the question really. Then Mike was telling me about how all his buddies and coworkers were going and then it hit me. This may be the only chance he gets to go with so many people for such a good time. Ive been telling him for a bit to get his brother and cousin together and go to Vegas but they are busy with their own lives in NY and who knows if that would ever happen. So as I was talking to him on gmail chat, 'cause thats how married we are-we use gmail chat to talk about big things, I told him if we could swing it then he needs to go. A few minutes later his ticket was booked and he was a happy camper. I told him that could be my big anniversary gift to him. I already went two years ago for a girls weekend so it was high time he went for his "Bros" weekend. He deserves a weekend with the guys playing and drinking and experiencing Vegas. The only stipulation was he had to try and be safe. No getting into fights or getting mugged. The plane had to take off and land without a incident and Id be perfectly calm. Also stories. He always ends up having the best stories. Even if its a night out with his buds at a local strip club he comes home with the best stories. So I figured its Vegas, he should have some awesome ones! I was excited for him and it made me remember the parts of Vegas I could remember too. I know he will have a blast.
After 10yrs of putting up with me he deserved some time in a different time zone on a vacation that didnt consist of schedules around a nap time. Mike and I really never took vacations (which is beyond us because now that we have Calvin we look at our former selves as morons) nor had a honeymoon. We woke up on a Friday and said "hey lets get married today!" and then two days later mike had to go back to work. He was Military when we got married so its not like he had the freewill to do what he wanted when he wanted. And all our "vacations" were back home to NY because we were stationed in Louisiana and didnt know better. Now that we are older and wiser we know we shouldve went to Hawaii or anywhere that was out of our time zone. This is 10yrs experience talking though. When youre 18 youre stupid so its not like our brains were fully functioning yet.
The past 10yrs have been a big learning experience in which we both grew and grew together. I couldnt imagine having this life with anyone else and I hope we are lucky enough to hit our 50yr and beyond anniversary.
I love you honey and heres to 50 more!
(Our little cake I had made for us since we didnt have one at our wedding)
It wasnt always this way though. We toyed awhile with even having a child. Especially since we live far from family and knew that it may be kinda selfish to have a child and not have their family around for them to know. Also, we have no help with family being away so that was a big thing. Being financially secure was a plus as Mike was still in the military and we lived in a small base house when we really considered what life would be like with a child. So we wanted to be sure we could afford a kid even though no one can ever afford a kid. Or themselves most of the time. Mike and I also wanted to be secure with each other. We didnt want to bring a child into this world and then rip his heart out with a divorce. With all the crap you go through in any relationship, unlike the movies, its not always roses. Theres a lot of dust and bugs and piles of crap along the way that either make you break you. For us, it made us stronger I think.
Mike is my foundation, walls and roof. I honestly dont know how my life would be with out him. Not because hes the main bread winner but because he really is my other half. We both have so much in common now and like to do the same things (as well as do things separately) that everything seems to flow smoothly. Im pretty sure he feels the same way too. I trust him 100% and he bends over backwards to make sure Calvin has everything he needs and that I can stay home and not put Calvin in a cruddy daycare (not knocking it for those who have to but I dont want to have to do that). Mike is a strong man with whom I always feel safe with and I know will defend me to the death. Hes an amazing father who loves his son and took to him like neither of us expected. Mike supports me and gives me piece of mind and always reassures the fact that Im being a good wife and mother.
I find now that I worry more about his safety then if hes going to find another women. If he does find another women then she better know how to clean and if so then I dont mind handing him over to her once and awhile. I kid, I kid. She better know how to cook too.
Mikes in Vegas for the next 5 days for some computer hacker convention thats supposed to be the biggest one they have all year. Hence the big deal in Vegas. Last year he couldnt go because I just spent 9 months gestating our son and then another 24hrs to push the almost full grown kid out. This year our big 10yr anniversary was the day before the Vegas fun times was going to begin. He really didnt push to go and I didnt think much of it. We thought money wise we wouldnt be able to swing it too so it was out of the question really. Then Mike was telling me about how all his buddies and coworkers were going and then it hit me. This may be the only chance he gets to go with so many people for such a good time. Ive been telling him for a bit to get his brother and cousin together and go to Vegas but they are busy with their own lives in NY and who knows if that would ever happen. So as I was talking to him on gmail chat, 'cause thats how married we are-we use gmail chat to talk about big things, I told him if we could swing it then he needs to go. A few minutes later his ticket was booked and he was a happy camper. I told him that could be my big anniversary gift to him. I already went two years ago for a girls weekend so it was high time he went for his "Bros" weekend. He deserves a weekend with the guys playing and drinking and experiencing Vegas. The only stipulation was he had to try and be safe. No getting into fights or getting mugged. The plane had to take off and land without a incident and Id be perfectly calm. Also stories. He always ends up having the best stories. Even if its a night out with his buds at a local strip club he comes home with the best stories. So I figured its Vegas, he should have some awesome ones! I was excited for him and it made me remember the parts of Vegas I could remember too. I know he will have a blast.
After 10yrs of putting up with me he deserved some time in a different time zone on a vacation that didnt consist of schedules around a nap time. Mike and I really never took vacations (which is beyond us because now that we have Calvin we look at our former selves as morons) nor had a honeymoon. We woke up on a Friday and said "hey lets get married today!" and then two days later mike had to go back to work. He was Military when we got married so its not like he had the freewill to do what he wanted when he wanted. And all our "vacations" were back home to NY because we were stationed in Louisiana and didnt know better. Now that we are older and wiser we know we shouldve went to Hawaii or anywhere that was out of our time zone. This is 10yrs experience talking though. When youre 18 youre stupid so its not like our brains were fully functioning yet.
The past 10yrs have been a big learning experience in which we both grew and grew together. I couldnt imagine having this life with anyone else and I hope we are lucky enough to hit our 50yr and beyond anniversary.
I love you honey and heres to 50 more!
(Our little cake I had made for us since we didnt have one at our wedding)
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Calvin turns 1!
Calvin turned 1 on July 1st (yes I know, I know its been almost a month since his birthday but weve been busy folks)and I always said time went by fast, but BOY DID TIME GO BY FAST!!
In his first year Ive learned many things. Ive learned a love that I never thought possible and a emptiness from loss filled. He is my heart, moon, stars, sky and universe. In his 1st year my life has become something I never thought it would be. I always thought about children, wanted children and knew life would be great with a child. Calvin has exceeded all my expectations of what a child would be to me and what me as a mother could be. I look at him and all the stars align and anything bad that has ever happened in my life has been erased because those things have brought me to him. With losing a parent you feel as if that love, the love youve had so deeply and maternally is gone and you would never have that again. With Calvin though, its like Ive had that second chance at that level of love. I love my husband and family like nothing else, and Calvin is the icing on the cake. My life is finally complete.
To Calvin, whos heartbeat I heard at 12 weeks pregnant gave me such a rush I felt like light was going to burst out of my heart; YOU are the reason why we are here. To love and be loved.
We celebrated Calvins 1st.birthday in our home town of Buffalo NY on Saturday July 3rd. My grandparents rented a shelter at Losson park so I could invite all of our family and friends to share in the big deal. Shelter 7 to be exact and it was home to many of MY parties growing up too. When I first pulled up to the shelter I stood there looking at it for a long time. My grandma didnt purposely reserve that shelter because she thought it had any meaning or remembered we had my parties there so she didnt know any different. But as I was hauling all the crap I packed from Ohio to bring to the park I stood and looked at that shelter and smiled. Its like I could stand there and see parties we had at that shelter whizzing by me. A bittersweet moment for me as I knew my mother wouldnt be here to celebrate Calvins big day with us. My entire family though was there. That was amazing. Its been a long time since all of my family and old friends have been together. Now Mikes whole family has been subjected to my family too and they still actually want to see us! I kid, I kid.
My brother manned the grill while my father kept score on the sidelines. My uncle Mark and Aunt Heather made sure my grandmother could get a ride to the park so she could be there. Friends of my mothers, neighbors of my fathers, Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents all showed up to eat, drink and watch Calvin shovel half of his cake into his mouth like banana cream frosting was going extinct.
This is home. Calvin has an amazing family and Im very happy we could do that for him. Mike and I are very lucky to have all the people in our lives that we do and now Calvin gets to reap the joy. Everyone has made his 1st birthday something I will always remember and can look back on and tell him about. He wont remember that day, but we have plenty of pictures and cards and he has parents who can fill him in on it.
People always say "its a 1st birthday, the kid isnt going to remember it so why make a big deal?". Well Calvin is a big deal to ME. Life with Calvin is a big deal and I want him to have anything he can get from this life. Any memory, any story, and any chance at knowing his family, friends and all loved ones is a big deal.
I want him to have many, MANY birthdays. This first one was super special though. This one signified the first year he spent grabbing hold of my heart and shooting it into the world.
This past year is dedicated to you Calvin,
Let there be cake!
In his first year Ive learned many things. Ive learned a love that I never thought possible and a emptiness from loss filled. He is my heart, moon, stars, sky and universe. In his 1st year my life has become something I never thought it would be. I always thought about children, wanted children and knew life would be great with a child. Calvin has exceeded all my expectations of what a child would be to me and what me as a mother could be. I look at him and all the stars align and anything bad that has ever happened in my life has been erased because those things have brought me to him. With losing a parent you feel as if that love, the love youve had so deeply and maternally is gone and you would never have that again. With Calvin though, its like Ive had that second chance at that level of love. I love my husband and family like nothing else, and Calvin is the icing on the cake. My life is finally complete.
To Calvin, whos heartbeat I heard at 12 weeks pregnant gave me such a rush I felt like light was going to burst out of my heart; YOU are the reason why we are here. To love and be loved.
We celebrated Calvins 1st.birthday in our home town of Buffalo NY on Saturday July 3rd. My grandparents rented a shelter at Losson park so I could invite all of our family and friends to share in the big deal. Shelter 7 to be exact and it was home to many of MY parties growing up too. When I first pulled up to the shelter I stood there looking at it for a long time. My grandma didnt purposely reserve that shelter because she thought it had any meaning or remembered we had my parties there so she didnt know any different. But as I was hauling all the crap I packed from Ohio to bring to the park I stood and looked at that shelter and smiled. Its like I could stand there and see parties we had at that shelter whizzing by me. A bittersweet moment for me as I knew my mother wouldnt be here to celebrate Calvins big day with us. My entire family though was there. That was amazing. Its been a long time since all of my family and old friends have been together. Now Mikes whole family has been subjected to my family too and they still actually want to see us! I kid, I kid.
My brother manned the grill while my father kept score on the sidelines. My uncle Mark and Aunt Heather made sure my grandmother could get a ride to the park so she could be there. Friends of my mothers, neighbors of my fathers, Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents all showed up to eat, drink and watch Calvin shovel half of his cake into his mouth like banana cream frosting was going extinct.
This is home. Calvin has an amazing family and Im very happy we could do that for him. Mike and I are very lucky to have all the people in our lives that we do and now Calvin gets to reap the joy. Everyone has made his 1st birthday something I will always remember and can look back on and tell him about. He wont remember that day, but we have plenty of pictures and cards and he has parents who can fill him in on it.
People always say "its a 1st birthday, the kid isnt going to remember it so why make a big deal?". Well Calvin is a big deal to ME. Life with Calvin is a big deal and I want him to have anything he can get from this life. Any memory, any story, and any chance at knowing his family, friends and all loved ones is a big deal.
I want him to have many, MANY birthdays. This first one was super special though. This one signified the first year he spent grabbing hold of my heart and shooting it into the world.
This past year is dedicated to you Calvin,
Let there be cake!
Re-newed appreciation.
The day to day life of a SAHM can be tedious.
7am Shower, listen to Calvin squawking through the monitor.
7:10am Dry off, dress and shove in contacts all at the same time.
7:11am Listen to Stimpy and Moxie meow and try to kill me by rubbing on my legs and feet. YES, I know, everyone is happy mommy is up!
7:15am Run into Calvins room and see he threw everything out of his bed and smells a bit like a farm.
7:16am YAY POOP DIAPER!
7:18am Wrestle with flailing baby to get all the embedded poop off of his butt.
7:23am No more poop till 9am
7:25am Go downstairs and "Open shop". Turn on lights, open blinds, feed crying cats and get Cals breakfast going. Or it will be the end of the world.
8:00am Clean up kiddo from the entire produce section he just ate and waffles/pancakes. This kid is the meaning of "eating us out of house and home".
8:00-8:30am David arrives!
8:30am David poops!
8:30am-9:30am Kiddos play. Their drug of choice lately is anything Ball. "Hey even though I have that ball in my hand right now but in blue I want the one you have in orange!"
9:00am Listen as Cal stops what hes doing to grunt his way to a new Poop.
9:05am Cal needs a new diaper.
9:30am Break up a ball fight
9:30am Calvin usually needs a nap. Put Calvin down and wrestle with him to take a nap. Listen to him cry through the monitor and hope he falls asleep. 75% of the time he goes to sleep, 25% he cries and cries and I have to go and get him. Then its more fighting for a ball.
10:00am-10:30am Calvin gets up and its snack time! Calvins favorite time of day is any time that involves food.
10:30am Gobble up goldfish crackers, whine for a 4 course meal.
10:45am Art! Or anything else on the plan such as books,flash cards,ABCs etc... A trip to the park, museum, or my favorite; TARGET!!
11:45am-12:00pm Arrive home from our destination and get ready for lunch. Listen as Calvin cries at my feet for food that shouldve been ready rightthissecond! Hes deprived.
12:30pm Clean up from lunch and kiddos run off some steam by playing. With? A BALL or one of the bowls from the pots and pans cabinet.
1:00pm-4:00pm David naps
1:00pm-2:00pm Calvin naps
2:00pm Get Calvin up, play, do some laundry. Wish I was napping.
3:00pm Calvin snack time (AGAIN)
4:00pm David gets up
4:15pm Davids snack time. Calvins time to whine for Davids snack.
4:30pm Music,book,puzzle,bubbles, end of the day entertainment.
5:30pm David goes home, start dinner. Try and be as fast as I can or Calvin will whine and cry like he hasnt eaten all day.
6:00pm Eat
6:30pm-7:30pm Entertain a whining toddler because he refused to take longer then a hour nap and has been up since 2
7:30pm Bathtime. Splash, throw toys out of the tub, stand and want to walk around in the bubbles, drink the bath water.
8:00pm Kiddo is asleep!!
8:00pm-8:30pm Clean up destroyed house. Sanitize.
8:30pm Sit down for the first time that day and relax OR go to the gym. Id much rather relax so that is why its taken me since December to drop just under 10lbs.
10:00pm ready for bed!
10:00pm and 30 seconds LIGHTS OUT and mommas passed out.
Now this is how my day at my old job was. The one where they screwed me:
7:30am-6:00pm THIS JOB SUCKS AND I WANT TO SCREAM ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY AND WISH THE DUMP WOULD BURN DOWN TO A PILE OF ASHES.
All. Day.
Yesterday I saw that one of my old co-workers is currently on vacation. This means they are down a person and have to do that co-workers work too. If I was still there that means it wouldve mostly fallen on me. It was a great reminder that I get to stay at home all day with my Son and play and teach him new things. Yesterday for instance, he walked over to where I have the bubbles on the shelf and said "bubble! bubble!". I taught him that and because of me hes growing and learning and thriving. Made my day. Also knowing that my old job was having a rough week and I was here, in my home, snuggling with my love all day made me smile. REAL big.
I love this life. There is nothing more I want to be doing then exactly what Im doing right now.
7am Shower, listen to Calvin squawking through the monitor.
7:10am Dry off, dress and shove in contacts all at the same time.
7:11am Listen to Stimpy and Moxie meow and try to kill me by rubbing on my legs and feet. YES, I know, everyone is happy mommy is up!
7:15am Run into Calvins room and see he threw everything out of his bed and smells a bit like a farm.
7:16am YAY POOP DIAPER!
7:18am Wrestle with flailing baby to get all the embedded poop off of his butt.
7:23am No more poop till 9am
7:25am Go downstairs and "Open shop". Turn on lights, open blinds, feed crying cats and get Cals breakfast going. Or it will be the end of the world.
8:00am Clean up kiddo from the entire produce section he just ate and waffles/pancakes. This kid is the meaning of "eating us out of house and home".
8:00-8:30am David arrives!
8:30am David poops!
8:30am-9:30am Kiddos play. Their drug of choice lately is anything Ball. "Hey even though I have that ball in my hand right now but in blue I want the one you have in orange!"
9:00am Listen as Cal stops what hes doing to grunt his way to a new Poop.
9:05am Cal needs a new diaper.
9:30am Break up a ball fight
9:30am Calvin usually needs a nap. Put Calvin down and wrestle with him to take a nap. Listen to him cry through the monitor and hope he falls asleep. 75% of the time he goes to sleep, 25% he cries and cries and I have to go and get him. Then its more fighting for a ball.
10:00am-10:30am Calvin gets up and its snack time! Calvins favorite time of day is any time that involves food.
10:30am Gobble up goldfish crackers, whine for a 4 course meal.
10:45am Art! Or anything else on the plan such as books,flash cards,ABCs etc... A trip to the park, museum, or my favorite; TARGET!!
11:45am-12:00pm Arrive home from our destination and get ready for lunch. Listen as Calvin cries at my feet for food that shouldve been ready rightthissecond! Hes deprived.
12:30pm Clean up from lunch and kiddos run off some steam by playing. With? A BALL or one of the bowls from the pots and pans cabinet.
1:00pm-4:00pm David naps
1:00pm-2:00pm Calvin naps
2:00pm Get Calvin up, play, do some laundry. Wish I was napping.
3:00pm Calvin snack time (AGAIN)
4:00pm David gets up
4:15pm Davids snack time. Calvins time to whine for Davids snack.
4:30pm Music,book,puzzle,bubbles, end of the day entertainment.
5:30pm David goes home, start dinner. Try and be as fast as I can or Calvin will whine and cry like he hasnt eaten all day.
6:00pm Eat
6:30pm-7:30pm Entertain a whining toddler because he refused to take longer then a hour nap and has been up since 2
7:30pm Bathtime. Splash, throw toys out of the tub, stand and want to walk around in the bubbles, drink the bath water.
8:00pm Kiddo is asleep!!
8:00pm-8:30pm Clean up destroyed house. Sanitize.
8:30pm Sit down for the first time that day and relax OR go to the gym. Id much rather relax so that is why its taken me since December to drop just under 10lbs.
10:00pm ready for bed!
10:00pm and 30 seconds LIGHTS OUT and mommas passed out.
Now this is how my day at my old job was. The one where they screwed me:
7:30am-6:00pm THIS JOB SUCKS AND I WANT TO SCREAM ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY AND WISH THE DUMP WOULD BURN DOWN TO A PILE OF ASHES.
All. Day.
Yesterday I saw that one of my old co-workers is currently on vacation. This means they are down a person and have to do that co-workers work too. If I was still there that means it wouldve mostly fallen on me. It was a great reminder that I get to stay at home all day with my Son and play and teach him new things. Yesterday for instance, he walked over to where I have the bubbles on the shelf and said "bubble! bubble!". I taught him that and because of me hes growing and learning and thriving. Made my day. Also knowing that my old job was having a rough week and I was here, in my home, snuggling with my love all day made me smile. REAL big.
I love this life. There is nothing more I want to be doing then exactly what Im doing right now.
Friday, July 23, 2010
No more Big Brother!
We still keep tabs on Calvin with a baby monitor. This helps for when Im downstairs and he wakes up from a nap and starts squawking for me to come get him rightthissecond! Yesterday I was down on the couch during his nap (taking a minute to sit while I waited for the lady to pick up bottles) and I heard the monitor go to static. This means the channel has been changed and could mean only one thing: Calvin was up and he found the base to his monitor that was UNDER his bed.
>
Yup. I ran up there and he had the cord (very safe!) in his hand and was pulling up the base of the monitor. If he was mad we were keeping tabs on him I dont know. Its only the beginning kid, you will ALWAYS be monitored.
>Yup. I ran up there and he had the cord (very safe!) in his hand and was pulling up the base of the monitor. If he was mad we were keeping tabs on him I dont know. Its only the beginning kid, you will ALWAYS be monitored.
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